Juneau -- The Republican National Committee today released its long-awaited inventory of Sarah Palin's clothes, seeking to end a month long furor over reports that it had spent $150,000 on designer clothes for the Vice-Presidential nominee. Spokesman Todd Burnham noted that the document released today was compiled by the Alaska Governor and her family in response to an RNC request to document which items in her wardrobe were purchased by the RNC for the campaign and would therefore be donated to charity. The notations are those of Gov. Palin and have not been verified yet by independent auditors.
Cream Valentino jacket – size 8 – Bought by RNC. Donate
6 pair girls’ underwear saying “True Love Waits” – these are Bristol’s. Keep
“I’d Tap That” T shirt (oil derrick logo), brown, size M – this belongs to John. Return
4 White T shirts – “I’m with stupid” – Nicole Wallace ordered these for my staff – please discard.
Red Manolo pumps, size 7 – I have already had these resoled with Vibram soles. Keep
Women’s underwear, embroidered with “Drill, Baby, Drill” – gift from Todd. Keep
Flyer’s Hockey Jacket, with mustard stains – gift. Note to self: No more hockey gigs without checking local voter registration. The Philadelphia owner must have been the only Republican in that crowd.
Camouflage pattern nightgown – gift from Todd. Keep
4 silk Hermes scarves – I am pretty sure the Wasilla town council gave me these when I was elected Governor. Keep
2 pair white long underwear – Not sure how these got here – Return to Mitt.
Kevlar bustier – gift from NRA. Keep
Dashiki size 44 – Todd bought this for his Jeremiah Wright Halloween outfit (please remove tube of “black face paint” from pocket). Keep
Apron with logo -- “A women’s place is in the House (and in the Senate)” – gift from Alaska Republicans – Please donate to charity (damn you, Mark Begich)